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Don’t Put Dick in Machinery Decals

A recent study* reported that 92% of Americans in the workforce work with one ore more dumbasses.

And if you are one of those unfortunate 92% of the population and work in an environment with moving parts, then you owe it to your co-worker dumbasses to grab a pack or two of these warning decals.

This package comes with 10 decals, each measuring roughly 6 inches long by 3 inches high.

Our studies* have shown that these stickers save approx. 12,500 accidental penis dismemberments per year!

Maybe you’re thinking that we should just let evolution take care of itself and not warn dumbasses about possible penis dismemberment.  But you’d be wrong.  Sure, they won’t be able to have anymore offspring, but think about who is going to have to clean up the machinery once they are carried away on a stretcher.  Yup, that would be you.  Ain’t nobody got time for that!

* In case you are one of the aforementioned 92% of the workforce that is a dumbass, please note that there are no studies on any of this stuff that we know of.  It is a joke. But I don’t know about you – but I’ve never worked at a job that didn’t have it’s fair share of dumbasses, so yeah.

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